One of my earliest memories is of kindergarten. Surprisingly (?) I was pretty shy in school as a kid, despite what my dad might argue. It was show-and-tell and I really don't remember what I brought... probably the pound puppy that had the Velcro pocket in the belly where the little pound puppies were... you remember...
Anyway, one girl, a girl I remember as being one of the popular girls in kindergarten, brought in an item that received a lot of attention. To this day I don't know if my memory serves me correctly, but I always think of this day.
I vividly recall a small group of girls huddled around while one of them held this:
A urinal cake.
A pink urinal cake. At the time, I had no idea what it was... to be fair, the girl who brought it probably had no idea either. But I remember exactly what it looked like. One day when I was old enough to realize boys pee in a urinal, I figured out what it was.
Unbeknownst to me, this was to be the first of many hilarious situations I'd live to tell. Even then, I think I knew I'd end up that sort of asshole kid making fun of the stupid things people do but I always wanted to be the popular girl with the cool show-and-tell.
You know what they say, who doesn't want their cake and to eat it too?